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I am who.

"...or was he kidding himself? reading lines from his own story into her face?


Ok, I'll bite.

just one more time,
maybe I'll find there's
a better way. Every time
I try, I can't stand. Everything
is only skin deep, no one says
words to me, they peel off the layers easily, in an order they want.
You see right through me
You see right by me
You see, listening or lying,
You see.



Find the one who breathes mischief
and I will tell you his merit.
Neglect to thicken the plot
well it's obvious what I bought.
When it tastes a little sour
I forget about the hour
Twist my tongue, I fell for another one.


Gone Fishing

Sometimes being "open-minded" makes you one-sided and being "close-minded" makes you see more clearly or not want to see at all. While others satisfy childish conversation, I wonder why I come to see time and time again. My statements are requests, my questions are statements. My trivia is an invitation to be friends. Throw a line from me to you and level with me.



and if i decide to sink or swim
I'll try not to dive to deep
but there is where I'll find
an innocence about you.
and I'll pretend we have the same eyes
if I try to fuse, you'll just abuse it
but it saves me from drowning.
and if you see it's really him against him
you broke it, you fix it.
try to heal it, and when you seal it
I'll give you everything.



At least I wasn't bleeding. I mean after being literally pushed through that window, I wondered. It's probably not safe to go stargazing or I might forget being where I am. My eyes are closing and my pains are expanding. These aren't the same old pains, stay still. If you try to move, you might find that you can't and you don't want to know, do you?

Forgive them because they don't know what they do to me, and to convict them any less than famous would be an inaccurate description to a picture being framed by an arsonist. Feeling that I am the sole cause for the space where the hesitation takes the smile: Oh, I can pour it on and have you consider your whole life. My face shows a truth for miles, I'll only remember once. Seeing the belief can impress even me, but leaving the hole, the imprint is somehow more prominent. Say you won't forget, because when I come back, it will be nothing new, like yesterday. Don't give up.


The Tile Man

Trying to lay tile over hollow floor
I'm ready to run water
Tell me to kneel and inspect the work
I'm ready to run water
Beg me for insults or compliments
This one doesn't hold water so
I'll wait cause' I saw the blueprints.



Oh, come on man, you know those neat freaks. They're so organized. Everything is put away all the time. You just know he's one of those crazy guys that is confident and successful. He doesn't even know he's got secrets written all over his face. Can you tell a lot about his life?

That's strange, you may know he's got secrets. You think you can tell things about him because he's clean? Oh he's crazy I'll bet, but just look at your room. Your room is a mess. Who can somebody tell more about, you or the "freaky" clean guy?


"...without the agony of repeat"

the eldest one won't speak much
failed with absorption
and I don't think he cares
some sounds are evil
Can you all see
his vocal cords are contortionists
He wants nothing
The only place is right here, right now
right now.


The Past Protector

Phil arrived about the same time everybody else did and once inside, gave himself a short tour of the place. Sometimes the made him feel comfortable. Other times, walking around the perimeter helped him to relax. He knew everybody who showed up and after greeting with them, explored more of his surroundings.

As the party got under way, everybody talked, drank and ate snacks. His intuition told him to be patient, but aware and he wondered what kind of experience would happen to him this evening. Fun and food kept up a great atmosphere and everyone shared in respect and conversation.

No one felt out of place. Usually there is a lull in what happens when they are all together, but tonight things flowed unusually well and Phil noticed. He thought about this and considered this was what he was waiting for. He paid close attention. Everything about this situation was ordinary, extremely ordinary, and in this mundane moment, Phil was filled with amazing energy and he realized the coincidence he had been waiting for was about to unfold.

Just then, Heather put a band aid on Will's forehead and quickly said "this is your past protector". There it was, and the message held Phil over for many thoughts. First, how could it go unnoticed, or ignored like so many nowadays, the wonder of if anybody else could consciously hear and comprehend what had happened. And the girl who said apparently didn't even know that she had said anything.

It was clear as crystal though, she probably would have taken offense if he would have made her aware just for being put on the spot. Isn't that strange, how the train of thought here continued, like a good book Phil refused to stop thinking of it. What could that be? First I'll find a way to make some people conscious of it.


I can help them to talk

We can watch the trees grow old
and mold the locks to fit our keys
Pour words from the mouths
of those who have stories they haven't told.
A broken fan, fresh blacktop, a patch
of dead grass, new curtains, a cigarette burn,
falling leaves, seem to be unimaginative and
to me can't breathe.



No, oh no, she's glowing...
She must think he's not done growing
But they are on the same side of the room
He just likes knowing.
Guess that keeps them on their feet
Only for him, she now looks more like a cheat
He likes the thought of being yet still unknown
and instinctively listens to her program so that
she can admit on her own and fill his cup again.
She always wants to toss
if not just to see him catch
but she better learn to keep that glove on
from above we can see the cork in her bat.
Won't need to concoct any drink
the mix is ready, he says to her
and my watch is right
no desire for fight or flight
Disappear if you wish, it's no delay.
Later, you'll only hear friendly or
frightening words but one's idea of
learning is another's excuse for failure.
Where's the respect going?
Falling through the dead air to a deep
valley in a cold freeze.
Even laughs are second thoughts anymore.
We've got to think about the horror first.
You can't hear if you're not listening.


double trouble

Knowing that fear, knowing those powers. I'm not the one to take advantage of them. Might test them to see that they are still there once in a while. A harmless test really. The side effects are small and no major changes or chain of events will fall. In fact, to ask before presenting it often happens. Words do have more than one meaning. Words lead to misunderstanding, sometimes causing such drastic effects, that a person is changed forever. There is no telling how much time I have left with this body. My luck, I'll probably get the same body next time.


easy now

if you lose that respect
a change in my face
shown in a way you can expect
disturbing and insulting


even steven

Ambivalence or indifference
Go ahead and blow me away
with what you say.
You might find we're both better
off understanding the same way.


I let you go

I let you go
I'm still here
You came back
Now, I don't know
One call made me think
I'm already love
Lose my jealousy
Lose my curiosity
Lose my assumption
Lose my mistrust
Lose my heart
Lose my hand


remnants from a dream:

The lady's store, car parked. Inside old indian woman is tripping.

I can feel her visions. She shows me a trinket sending a wave of energy nearly knocking me down on the ground. I look at her to smile as she turns to go. I turn and speak to her partner to ask her what the wave was from. I know now, I was the only one besides her and the lady who knew. She said "do not worry young man, you will be OK". I leave to get my wallet out of the car. I was going to buy that trinket. Everybody on the street is watching a movie of horror and another lady is speaking in tongues. I ask to repeat it for me to understand. She and I hear a terrible noise and saw a man machine gun down two kids. He is coming, I pick up the woman. She is on my back, as we head to other end of the lot. We fall to the sound of the machine gun. I hold my breath for a moment of death. It was over, I was alive the woman on my back was too. As if the other two ladies were telling my immediate future, this lady had delayed her knowing. She gets up and screams.